A Letter to my Brother...

So this isn't going to be one of my four letters, but I just feel the need to write it to John, and share...

Dear John,

I am so sorry that I haven't called or even texted you to see how you are handling everything that has happened at home, but it just hurts me too much. It brings back so many memories for me, and it's hard. I know that I shouldn't be like that, so I am getting out my feelings the best way that I know how.

It's not easy losing someone that is your own age, someone you grew up with. When I heard the news I honestly thought of you right away, because I know how it feels to get that news... that one of your peers is gone.

Even if you and Jacob weren't the closest of friends in the recent years I know that it is hard because the group of kids that you start elementary school and CCD with are your first friends which always hold a special place in your heart, and to lose one of those friends is unlike anything else you can experience at such a young age. And I'm sorry.

In high school I loved coming home from CCD and having you tell us what funny or obnoxious thing Jacob A. did that day. From your stories I could tell he was the class clown and that he always would be. But I still remember him at Girl Scout camp, and I still remember him coming trick or treating at our house and I just remember his smile and the joke he was telling. He was a special kid.

I know it's hard and I'm sorry that you and your classmates are going through this. I know all too well what it feels like and I hate to say that it won't get much easier very soon, especially when you are back with that group of people that Jacob A. was such a part of.

Honor Jacob, Don't Take Anything For Granted, And Be Your Best... this is what I hope you take away from this tragic situation.

I love you,

Tracy